How could I just limit myself to 10 foods?
I love food. I love it a bit too much.
Love it more than I love myself sometimes.
Which is a vicious cycle - clearly, I'm fluffy and struggling to lose weight.
Today, July 29th... I'm loving myself more than I'm loving food. Food is here to help me survive. I need it to live. And I want to live a fantastic day today.
1) Peanut Butter anything - cookies, shakes, pie, cheesecake, or even by itself. Hmmmm peanut butter.
2) Eggs - anyway.
3) Cottage cheese - love it plain, love it with cherry tomatoes and jalepeno strip thingys, love it with mango and tajin.
4) CHERRIES!! OMG!!!
5) Pupusas - I'm afraid I've already had the best at La Manana on E 7th, so I'm scared to try anywhere else.
6) Spreadable cheese - Laughing Cow's Spicy Pepper one is amazing!
7) Cheesecake - prefer just plain cheesecake - or the one with the glazed strawberry on top at Cafe Latte.
8) Donuts - nothing jelly filled though
9) Alfredo - unfortunately I could just drink it.
10) Pickles! Omg, these have been a godsend to have with lunches! TOTAL Godsend! :)
I'm going to go have a fantastic day. You should to.
Sunday, July 29, 2018
Monday, July 23, 2018
My Why!
Being a heavy weight gal...
Trying to stay on track...
and having mild depression...
Isn't the easiest thing.
I'm trying to remember my why - and sometimes it gets lost in the feelings of sadness, loneliness, and embarrassment.
Well - my why got lost completely last night - actually this whole weekend. I didn't fall completely off the rails, but I didn't care what and how much I put in my mouth.
UNTIL...
I woke up this morning.
When I woke up I remembered exactly why I don't do this to myself. Why I can't do this to myself.
Last night I indulged on pop tarts, the banana cake Ella made, peanut butter, nutella, and frosting.
On top of the pupusas, chicken tenders, m&m's, french fries, etc.
It's awful. Why did I do it? I'm not sure. If I really sit and think about it, it all stems to my anxiety. I was anxious all weekend about Ella leaving for camp yesterday. Even though its the 2nd time she's gone to this camp. She's going to be far away from me and I'll miss her terribly.
And then she left. And I didn't allow myself ot follow plan. I lost myself. With BINGO, I just ate and ate. It was awful.
I felt empty without her there. Hopefully I can keep that in the back of my head for the rest of the week. Good thing I get to go out for dinner with people this week. It's going to be a great week without her. But why can't I allow myself just to succeed?
Just fricking do it Sam.
I need to remember the Why in it all.
I don't want to fall again and be in so much pain - that I truly think I broke or fratctured my hip.
I want to be able to keep up with Ella.
I want to show Ella that being active and eating healthier is actually a great way to live.
I want to look better in my clothes
I want to feel better in my clothes
I want to be more comfortable in my skin
I want heels to be a breeze to wear.
I want to find a STUNNING dress for the next banquet.
I want to hear the compliments of how I look
I want to hear the statements where they say I am motivating them
I want to feel like a new person.
I want to thrive.
I don't want to fall down and stay down again.
I deserve happiness.
I deserve to see the end goal.
I deserve to see the finish line.
I deserve to lose it all and become lifetime.
Trying to stay on track...
and having mild depression...
Isn't the easiest thing.
I'm trying to remember my why - and sometimes it gets lost in the feelings of sadness, loneliness, and embarrassment.
Well - my why got lost completely last night - actually this whole weekend. I didn't fall completely off the rails, but I didn't care what and how much I put in my mouth.
UNTIL...
I woke up this morning.
When I woke up I remembered exactly why I don't do this to myself. Why I can't do this to myself.
Last night I indulged on pop tarts, the banana cake Ella made, peanut butter, nutella, and frosting.
On top of the pupusas, chicken tenders, m&m's, french fries, etc.
It's awful. Why did I do it? I'm not sure. If I really sit and think about it, it all stems to my anxiety. I was anxious all weekend about Ella leaving for camp yesterday. Even though its the 2nd time she's gone to this camp. She's going to be far away from me and I'll miss her terribly.
And then she left. And I didn't allow myself ot follow plan. I lost myself. With BINGO, I just ate and ate. It was awful.
I felt empty without her there. Hopefully I can keep that in the back of my head for the rest of the week. Good thing I get to go out for dinner with people this week. It's going to be a great week without her. But why can't I allow myself just to succeed?
Just fricking do it Sam.
I need to remember the Why in it all.
I don't want to fall again and be in so much pain - that I truly think I broke or fratctured my hip.
I want to be able to keep up with Ella.
I want to show Ella that being active and eating healthier is actually a great way to live.
I want to look better in my clothes
I want to feel better in my clothes
I want to be more comfortable in my skin
I want heels to be a breeze to wear.
I want to find a STUNNING dress for the next banquet.
I want to hear the compliments of how I look
I want to hear the statements where they say I am motivating them
I want to feel like a new person.
I want to thrive.
I don't want to fall down and stay down again.
I deserve happiness.
I deserve to see the end goal.
I deserve to see the finish line.
I deserve to lose it all and become lifetime.
Blog Challenge - Day 10 - Best Trip of Your Life
Best Trip of my life?
Well... I'm going to have to say the trip where I got to take Ella down to Florida in 2015.
We stayed in a townhouse for a few days and then stayed with my aunt and uncle a few days.
We did the Universal Studios two days, Medevil Times dinner, and we hung out at the beach.
It was a stressful trip, but worth it.
Can't wait to go on out next adventure.
Saturday, July 14, 2018
Blog Challenge - Day 9 - "What's in Your Bag"
First and foremost, trying to squeeze time into blog EVERY day has been difficult and I don't care. I've got plenty of living to do.
I'm proud I'm on day 9, and even though it's taking me over 30 days to get to Day 9, I'm proud I'm still doing it.
Today's topic is weird, "What's in Your Bag?"
Why do you care? I mean really???
I will almost always have 2 different types of something for my lips (lipstick, chapstick/lip balm, and lip gloss is pictured). I ALWAYS have gum, lighters, pens, and body spray/perfume.
My WW books, a Bingo dobber, business cards, the infamous wallet, mints, keys (obviously), and nicotine gum keeps me going.
My purse isn't anything fancy, it's Merona - which I scored at the MN Home Outlet about 6 months ago for $15 and the wallet and lil pouch thing are from Thirty-One.
Nothing fancy - but sometimes if someone asks about the wallet, I'll tell them its a fancy dead lizard of some sorts to get their facial expression. lol
Well now your nosey self wants to see what it looks like all laid out, I'm sure...
It's ok - I'd be nosy too.
I'm proud I'm on day 9, and even though it's taking me over 30 days to get to Day 9, I'm proud I'm still doing it.
Today's topic is weird, "What's in Your Bag?"
Why do you care? I mean really???
I will almost always have 2 different types of something for my lips (lipstick, chapstick/lip balm, and lip gloss is pictured). I ALWAYS have gum, lighters, pens, and body spray/perfume.
My WW books, a Bingo dobber, business cards, the infamous wallet, mints, keys (obviously), and nicotine gum keeps me going.
My purse isn't anything fancy, it's Merona - which I scored at the MN Home Outlet about 6 months ago for $15 and the wallet and lil pouch thing are from Thirty-One.
Nothing fancy - but sometimes if someone asks about the wallet, I'll tell them its a fancy dead lizard of some sorts to get their facial expression. lol
Well now your nosey self wants to see what it looks like all laid out, I'm sure...
It's ok - I'd be nosy too.
Saturday, July 7, 2018
Blog Challenge - Day 8 - "Your 5 Current Goals"
Gosh, it's been awhile.
This blog day challenge - is that: a challenge.
I don't know my current goals. I have no clue what's going on anymore. My head is constantly analyzing and sorting things, but never putting them into action.
Every Merchandising/Marketing meeting my boss puts on her agenda "A goal is a wish without a plan".
And when I came to this day in my challenge to blog, I stalled. I honestly am so confused with life, that I don't know what's up or down.
Ya know, as I over analyze things, it dawned on me. It's simple.
1) Finish this blog challenge
2) Finish the book I'm reading "Out of Line" by Barbara Lynch
3) STICK TO WEIGHT WATCHERS
4) Get my passport
5) Get through this court thing
That's not too scary.
I gotta stop over analyzing things. The answers are right there.
This blog day challenge - is that: a challenge.
I don't know my current goals. I have no clue what's going on anymore. My head is constantly analyzing and sorting things, but never putting them into action.
Every Merchandising/Marketing meeting my boss puts on her agenda "A goal is a wish without a plan".
And when I came to this day in my challenge to blog, I stalled. I honestly am so confused with life, that I don't know what's up or down.
Ya know, as I over analyze things, it dawned on me. It's simple.
1) Finish this blog challenge
2) Finish the book I'm reading "Out of Line" by Barbara Lynch
3) STICK TO WEIGHT WATCHERS
4) Get my passport
5) Get through this court thing
That's not too scary.
I gotta stop over analyzing things. The answers are right there.
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